Who defines Fate?

“See that fella over there? He's 20 years old. In 10 years, he's got a chance to be a star. Now that fella over there, he's 20 years old, too. In 10 years he's got a chance to be 30.”

They say the difference between the two is ‘Fate’.

If you ask me, I’m kind of confused with this whole ‘Fate’ thing. We are all human beings and each of us have un-imaginable powers within us. In spite of that don’t we get to choose our own destiny, be what we want to be and do what we want to do? Isn’t everything possible? Why do we always restrict ourselves? But there are those that believe that our fate is already decided……and that no matter what we do; we must finally accept the good and the bad that fate brings along…. How can this make any sense…..? How can our future already be written somewhere? Don’t we have the right to choose what we want for our self?

Are we so weak that we need to portray our inabilities as fate?? Can we not be free? Free from this invisible bondage?

Ralph Waldo Emerson said “Whatever limits us we call fate. Men are never prisoners of fate, but only prisoners of their own minds.”

“There is no chance, no destiny, no fate, that can hinder or control the firm resolve of a determined soul. A man, when he wishes, is the master of his fate.”

“It (destiny) is what you have always wanted to accomplish. Everyone, when they are young, knows what their destiny is. At that point in their lives, everything is clear and everything is possible. They are not afraid to dream, and to yearn for everything they would like to see happen to them in their lives. But, as time passes, a mysterious force begins to convince them that it will be impossible for them to realize their destiny.”
--- Paulo Coelho

Are we getting too old to dream? Or are we just losing the spark in our lives?

Fate only takes you so far, and then it's up to you to make it happen… Let’s not forget what we are capable of.

‘When I was younger, things happened in my life that made me wonder if they were a coincidence or was it fate? And now, as the years have passed, I strongly believe in fate -Everything happens for a reason. “
--Catherine Pulsifer

Don’t get me wrong, I strongly believe that everything that happens in life, always happens for the best (even if that is sometimes not visible to us till years later). But does this necessarily mean that it is fate and we can’t do anything to change that? Once things happen to us, it’s very easy for us to turn around and say that it is ‘fate’…..and that it’s happened for the best…..but since we haven’t actually seen fate, how do we know that whatever is happening to us is as per this great plan called fate?? How can we be so sure that it is not what we ourselves have done… Maybe whatever we choose to do, we call it fate. When things work out the way we want them to, we say it’s our fate and destiny and when things don’t go as per our plans we just blame it on fate and say, maybe it was never meant to be.

What if there is nothing such as fate? Maybe it was always us doing all the work and giving the credit to fate??

Each man is the architect of his own fate.
--- Appius Claudius

Croeso I Cymru… A trip down memory lane

We often say that our school days were some of the best days of our lives and here I find myself going back to those days when I used to look outside the window of my corner classroom, counting the seconds for the bell to ring and for another day’s class to come to an end. Let’s face it, the actual classes weren’t that much fun, but it was the time outside the classroom, may it be in the school campus hanging out with friends, or in the canteen, or outside the gates waiting for that special crush, or in some favourite haunt or simply in a friends house that made those schools days so memorable.

12 years on things haven’t really changed that much. There are no bells and there are no fixed times, but there’s always something that we look forward to more than anything. Something that will make us smile and make that day a little less unbearable. It could be that someone special who is eagerly waiting for you to finish work, or it could be a hobby that you are really into, or it could simply be spending time with your friends and family.

Well, for me it has always been spending time with friends and this blog is about my life, rather our lives in Cardiff.

I have spent more than 18 months or so in this city and I have always believed that it was one of the best places to be in and I had grown over the months to love every beat of this city. Note that I say this in the past tense. The last couple of weeks have however been a bit different to say the least and that beat no longer throbs within me and it isn’t difficult to figure out why

My story begins on the 13th floor of the tallest building in Cardiff. To those who are not familiar with this city, that is the BT building and my desk was on the 13th floor. This was like a little battle ground. This happens to be the place we initially dreaded to move too and the place that ultimately brought us closer. Like any battle, we obviously had our own war room in one corner, form where we used to touch base with headquarters and get our new missions. Not sure if we won or lost the battle and neither does it matter anymore. But strangely enough I don’t think any of us will ever forget that little room called ‘Kilimanjaro’. (I certainly won’t because I am still sitting next to it…)

And offcourse after the bell rings or in other words once we finish with work, there were plenty of things to do. Prince of Wales on Fridays almost became a ritual for us. One Orange Juice, One pint of Carling, One blue lagoon and One Jack Daniels with a plate of nachos on table 68. Badminton on every alternate evening, a drink at Nosda on a cool summer evening overlooking the shallow waters of River Taff, were all the little things we had taken for granted.

Our daily lunches at the canteen, take-away from walk the wok, a bite at Subway, an afternoon stroll in the city centre (only on those light days), the monstrous lunch at Spice Root over the weekends, home deliveries from Café Naz, Monday nights at Q-Bar for a free round of pool, unlimited movies at Cineworld, the un-fulfilled dreams of a Bash were just few of the things that kept us occupied. And lets not forget that all of us are great cooks as well. We used to all take turns in making our specialities for dinner. Some made hot and spicy mutton, some made excellent chicken (that is me by the way… ) while some gave us dreams of Biriyani. But amongst us all part-time Master Chefs, there were two genuinely natural and talented Chefs who were always ready with their special home cooked meals. I can safely say I have spent more time in this house than in my own. New and experimental party punches, Diwali Santa, dumb sharades, bingo, hundreds of hours on Nintendo Wii, we did it all. We were like one big happy family.

Lets not put aside our travels and excursions around UK and Europe. Spending the new year in the worlds most romantic city amidst the Eiffel Tower, welcoming the new year amongst the fireworks, lights and splendour of Disney Land, standing above the holy grail at the Louvre, walking down the Champs Elysees with a Hagen Diaz ice-cream, travelling to the highest point in Europe amongst the mountains of Jungfrauch, playing and fighting in the snow-capped mountains of Titlis, my first and last taste of the much heard of Cheese Fondue, taking in the fresh mountain air of Zermatt, a stroll by the Rhine Falls, a cruise on lake Geneva, the exhilarating view of the Island of Capri, a look into the home of the roman gladiators at the colosseum, standing under the leaning tower of Pisa, a peek into the Vatican and the glory of St Peters Basillica, a Gondola ride in the rainy afternoon in Venice, a hot cup of coffee at Piazza San Marco and finally a glimpse of the Duomo at Milan, the fashion capital of the world.

Coming closer to home, we did manage to pay homage to the great Loch Ness monster in the Lochs of Scotland, a salute to the Edinburgh castle, mingling with the tigers and wolves at Longleats and keeping the car well away from the monkeys, a Barbeque in the cold Summer evening at Prembrokshire with only the fire and the red wine to keep the cold away, amidst the wild rides at Oakwood and the shooting, golf, archery and go-carting at Heatherton, chugging along the Brecon Mountains Railways with a sensual traditional lunch at the Red Cow Inn, the roaring of the trucks at Monster Jam and the mesmerizing Madonna on her opening night were just some of the high-lights of my stay here.

There is so much more to pen down and I could go on and on but allow me to put a cap on my thoughts for now.

We spent so much time here and looking back on them now, they seem so special. Strangely I never realised how special those days were until now. Believe me it wasn’t Cardiff that was fun and it wasn’t Cardiff‘s beat that I loved, it was all of us that made it a fun place to be in and it was us that gave a beat to this city..

And what is sad is that all of us might never be together again, but I’m happy that we have created such amazing memories and friends that we will cherish forever…

I still have some wonderful friends here today, but things have certainly changed... I can’t help but wonder what it would be like if we were all back together again in this city known as ‘Cymru’. Unfortunately all I can do is wonder and pray that we get a chance to continue this adventure somewhere along the way.

Croeso I Cymru ! That means Welcome to Wales !

Note: I have not named any characters above but I’m sure they can relate to the different parts of this blog.

Just Switch Off !

Have you ever felt the need to switch off? To take a break from the daily hustle and bustle of life?

Most of us work 10-12 hours a day, 5-6 days a week…and then there are few that go beyond this as well… Isn’t it just crazy at what we are compelling ourselves to do? Isn’t it funny how we have made slaves of ourselves to corporate India? We work ourselves to death and for what? Are the benefits we strive for, worth the life we are throwing away?

Haven’t we forgotten that we need to work to live and not live to work? I know, some of you would be saying that to achieve your goals and fulfill your ambitions we need to work and slog hard... I know this because I was one of these people. I used to say the same things to myself and make myself content at being this slave.

And then? I see an old man who is extremely successful and has got everything he ever wanted in life… But I see that he has no past…he has nothing that he can look back and smile at… Is the one life we are granted worth all this? As one of my close friends would say, “What is the world coming too?”… She’s right….It’s not only injustice, crime and politics which has lead to the downfall of our generation. It is also the immense pressure and stress we put ourselves under and all in the name of success…

It’s time to change….it’s time to take some time off and analyse where and how we are placed in life. It’s time we realize what we are doing to ourselves and ask ourselves if it is worth it…!

Many of us will read this….agree with it and then forget it and move on with their lives…the choice Is yours….This is only a blog and my interpretation of what we are doing to ourselves. Time waits for no one….stop wasting yours!

*** A final note ***

Sadly my annual leave comes to an end and it’s time to get back into the normal grind of life. This is my last post from India although now that I am hooked onto this thing called ‘Blogging’, I’m sure I’ll be spending a lot more time on this and it’s give me a great way to feel connected to you guys. But I must stay, i feel great. A whole month of being lazy and doing nothing….sleeping, mails, chatting, shopping, partying… it was exactly what i needed. Trust me, you should all take some time to switch off and spend time with your family, your friends and just yourself….It’s worth it!

Why Marriage?

When I was young….in class 10 or 11, I still remember the reaction at home when I used to bring my friends home (…of the fairer sex). My family was quite modern and they never said anything to me but I always got the occasional comment about how early this was to get a girl-friend and how I should have my priorities in order.

Today, strangely the situation has reversed. I’m 26 now….and believe me this is not the age for a bachelor to be around their family and relatives. All questions seem to be revolving around a girl. Do I have anyone special in my life? Should we start looking for someone? You’re already 26, you should start taking this seriously! I know of this Priya…Shriya girl, would you like to meet her? And the questions go on…

The irony off course is I am currently really not into this marriage thing. I have been through a long relationship and now I’m at a place in my life where I just want to concentrate on other things. Building a strong position in my career, having fun with my friends on my own terms, investments, stock markets……basically just being independent and aloof from all the responsibilities that are associated with marriage.

Somehow the concept of marriage does scare me… Maybe it’s because I just haven’t found the right girl. But what worries me more is how I will ever know if the person I will meet is the ‘Right’ girl? I personally dis-like making compromises with my life….specially when it comes to friendship and the lifestyle I am currently used too… What if the girl I like doesn’t appreciate my friends or doesn’t like my life-style? Most people might compromise and distance themselves from their friends or their earlier life-style…..this is where I know I will fail. Friendship is the most important thing to me and in such a situation I would probably stand by my friendship…I say this not as an assumption but out of experience. What’s more is that I would do this without a blink of an eye. Some might agree with me while most others would tell me to get my priorities straight. Some might call me hard-hearted but I call it honesty. And some might just say – ‘A Typical Sagittarian’. Fortunately or unfortunately this is who I am and I am proud of it.

However I must say, I’m confused and intrigued at the same time at what the future has in store for me. I wish I could see 5 years into the future and see who my future partner is and to see when I finally gave into marriage. I am curious to know if I have I already met her somewhere? Is she in my life today? Questions that will all remain unanswered till the time comes or till I invent a time machine (and I presume the latter is not likely to happen in this lifetime).

I pray I find my soul-mate some day (if there is such a thing as a soul-mate), and maybe one day we would be sitting together reading this Blog and laughing at how things have changed and how we were so immature then.

However, as of today the 30th day of June in the year 2008 AD, I still ask my self Why marriage? There is still time…. Isn’t there?